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Miscarriage can trigger post-traumatic stress disorder

Miscarriage can trigger post-traumatic stress disorder

Nicole MartinImage copyrightNICOLE MARTIN
Image captionNicole was not part of the trial, but hopes that by sharing her experience she can help support other people who have lost a baby to miscarriage

Women who have recently had a miscarriage are at risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder, doctors at Imperial College London have said.

At their early pregnancy loss clinic, a third of the women have PTSD symptoms.

Nicole Martin had three miscarriages in a year, her “dark days”.

“Everyone thinks because you’ve already got a child it’s easier. In a lot of respects it definitely is easier than not having a child, but I wanted another child for [my child’s] sake.”

Nicole and her husband, Ben, started trying for their second child just after their first, Eva, had turned one.

“I was 38 years old and fully aware of the risks associated with having children a bit later in life,” she says.

“It took me longer than expected to fall pregnant, and when I did I felt very anxious because many of my friends had suffered at least one miscarriage.”

Nicole and her familyImage copyrightNICOLE MARTIN
Image captionNicole and her family – husband Ben, daughter, Eva, and son, Joseph

Nicole’s story

She was carrying twins, but both died – one at five weeks and the other seven weeks into the pregnancy.

Nicole had to have an operation under general anaesthetic to treat the miscarriage.

Although shell-shocked by the experience, Ben and Nicole continued to try for a baby.

Two months later, Nicole was pregnant, but had another miscarriage at seven weeks.

“The scan showed there was no heartbeat,” she says.

“We had to have medical management this time.

“You get given a tablet which breaks down the lining of your womb and you just get sent home to miscarry.

“It’s really not pleasant.

“It’s your baby, and you have to flush it down the loo.

“It’s horrendous.”

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Pregnancy loss and PTSD

Post-traumatic stress disorder can develop after a very stressful, frightening or distressing event, or a prolonged traumatic experience.

As many as one in four pregnancies is thought to end in a miscarriage – loss of a pregnancy during the first 23 weeks.

An ectopic pregnancy is when a fertilised egg implants itself outside of the womb, usually in one of the fallopian tubes.

It is not possible to save the pregnancy. It usually has to be removed using medicine or an operation.

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Her subsequent third miscarriage a few months later left her a nervous wreck.

“I was a mess,” she says.

“Everywhere I went mothers were asking me, ‘When are you going to have another child?’

“I never ask a woman now about whether she’s having babies, or having a second baby, because you never know their story.”

Nicole says she nearly gave up all hope.

Ultrasound scan in pregnancyImage copyright THINKSTOCK

“I found it just unbelievably cruel,” she says.

“I remember phoning my consultant who was great.

“I said, ‘Just tell me what I should do.’

“I really wanted someone from the medical profession to say, ‘Just give up.'”

Instead, the consultant told Nicole to keep trying if she had the emotional strength because there was still a good chance she would be able to have a healthy baby.

Two months later – just after Nicole’s 40th birthday – she was pregnant with her son, Joseph, who is now nearly two years old.

“I still worry a lot, and I’m having cognitive behavioural therapy to help me cope with that,” she says.

“Even though we have two beautiful children, I still feel anxious to this day because I can’t quite believe it’s all over.

“I feel that something’s going to spoil our lovely family unit because it was such a struggle getting there.”

Dr Jessica Farren, who carried out the BMJ Open study on nearly 90 women attending the pregnancy clinic at Imperial College London for a suspected miscarriage or ectopic pregnancy, says although only a minority might have full-blown PTSD, many will suffer from moderate-to-severe anxiety.

“It’s the tip of the iceberg really,” he says.

“There will be a huge number of women who would still benefit from some support. But the NHS isn’t geared up for it.

“Once we’ve looked after these women clinically and discharged them, there’s no real opportunity to check how they are coping emotionally.”

After a healthy pregnancy, all women get screened for depression at their six-week check. But following a miscarriage, there are no routine emotional checks.

Dr Farren and her colleagues are studying more women at their clinic to see if they can better spot those that will need the most support.

In the meantime, they say help is out there if you know where to look.

“There are some really good charities and organisations that can offer counselling, and your GP is a good place to start if you want some help accessing support,” says Dr Farren.

Source: http://www.bbc.com/news/health-37833287

Adele speaks about her postnatal depression after the birth of her son Angelo

Adele speaks about her postnatal depression after the birth of her son Angelo

Adele has opened up about her battle with postnatal depression after the birth of her son, Angelo.

FROM THE TOPICLIFE

The singer told Vanity Fair magazine that she felt, at the time, like she had made “the worst decision” of her life.

The 28-year old goes on to say that she “loves her son more than anything” but admits she really struggled adjusting to motherhood.

“I was obsessed with my child. I felt very inadequate,” she says.

Adele

Angelo is now four and Adele’s only child with partner Simon Konecki.

He advised her to talk to other mothers about her concerns. She says she refused at first but the depression “lifted” once she confided in a friend who had a child and realised she wasn’t alone.

She goes on to say that taking an afternoon a week to herself improved the situation.

“A friend of mine said, ‘Really? Don’t you feel bad?’ I said, ‘I do, but not as bad as I’d feel if I didn’t do it.’ It makes you a better mum if you give yourself a better time.”

The interview comes as Adele reaches the end of her 10-month tour to mark her album 25. She admits she still feels uncomfortable spending time away from her son.

“I’m enjoying touring, but at times I feel guilty because I’m doing this massive tour, and even though my son is with me all the time, on certain nights I can’t put him to bed.

“I never feel guilty when I’m not working,” she adds.

“You’re constantly trying to make up for stuff when you’re a mum. I don’t mind, because of the love I feel for him.”

The singer also spoke of how her stage fright is so bad that she may never tour again.

“I’d still like to make records, but I’d be fine if I never heard [the applause] again. I’m on tour simply to see everyone who’s been so supportive.”

Looking ahead to new material Adele reveals that she thinks she “will never write songs as good as the ones that are on 21”, admitting “I was completely off my face” while writing the second album.

She says the success of tracks like Someone Like You were largely down to drinking two bottles of wine a night and chain-smoking on a regular basis.

“A drunk tongue is an honest one,” she said. “I’m not as indulgent as I was then, and I don’t have time to fall apart like I did then.”

If you want help or advice on depression, visit BBC Advice.

10 Ways To Fix A Bad Relationship

10 Ways To Fix A Bad Relationship

How would you rate your relationship on a scale of 1-10? If you answered “5” or less, you are in a bad relationship that needs some fixing.

BY

BORED?

Would you describe your life with your significant other as a routine? Nothing is more boring than monotony. Here’s five easy ways to give your relationship a little OOMPH! 

1. Make time for each other.

Absence is rumored to make the heart grow fonder, but that doesn’t mean your relationship can thrive without any time devoted to it.  Life gets busy, especially if you have kids/school/a job/a second job and OMG, ALL THE THINGS; but your relationship is a priority no matter how full your plate may be. Have a daily, 10-minute mini-date where you snuggle up with a silly YouTube video, take a quick walk, have some ice cream, or whatever you both enjoy.

2. Switch up date-night.

Dinner-and-a-movie is a staple for a reason (because it’s fun), but it can grow stale without the occasional mix-up. For example: You could grab coffee or hot cocoa, go to a park on a breezy day and find yourself with a perfect excuse to cuddle.

3. Take an adventure.

Do something exciting together! You could take a cruise, go on a road-trip, jump out of a plane, visit a rain forest, or climb Mt. Everest.

4. Learn something new.

Tackle a hobby of mutual interest with your partner. Whether you want to learn to speak Italian, become a Jeopardy contestant or create handmade jewelry is up to you. Challenging yourselves to grow will strengthen your bond and shake-up your ho-hum love life.

5. Create a Bucket List.

Make a list of all the crazy, ambitious, and wonderful things you want to do with your partner. Be happy you have someone to share your life with. Take small steps to make your Bucket List items happen.

ANGRY?

There is no reason to bottle up our feelings in relationships. I know you might be intimidated by conflict, but there is no hiding from it. Sure, you could just keep saying “nothing is wrong,” but that would only delay the inevitable. Feelings that are held in have a way of intensifying. Pissed off? Take a deep breath and let’s deal with it:

6. Count to 10.

If you find word vomit escaping your lips, one of those hurtful things you know you’re going to regret saying later, hold it in and count to ten. Breathe in. Breathe out. Still want to say it? Go for it. Not so much? Crisis averted.

7. See it from the other side.

“It was a great surprise to me when I discovered that most of the ugliness I saw in others, was but a reflection of my own nature.” -Anonymous

Before you criticize another person, take a second to look at the scenario from their perspective. Most people act the way they do for a reason. See yourself in their eyes to make sure the problem doesn’t reside in yourself.

8. Give and receive.

Did you get a wonderful back rub after a rough day at the office? Return the favor (or surprise your partner with a tasty dessert or coffee at work). A perceived imbalance in who puts the most into your relationship can make a person upset in a hurry. Split chores and housework fairly, take turns deciding what to have for dinner, and aim for equality in your relationship.

9. Express yourself with no filter.

You can’t expect your partner to know something is wrong if you don’t tell them. Express your feelings without filter (especially if you’re being asked “What’s wrong?” repeatedly). Confrontation isn’t fun but it’s also unavoidable. Dragging out a fight is just going to place unnecessary strain on your relationship, so get it over with and express yourself.

10. Appreciate each other.

What do you find sexy or handsome about your partner? Do they have any quirks you find wonderful? What is the sweetest thing they ever did for you? Sometimes, we’re so busy focusing on our partner’s negative traits that we forget to appreciate what we have and what made us fall in love with them in the first place.

Is There Life After Menopause?

Is There Life After Menopause?

By

Well, it might not feel like it when you’re in the middle of perimenopause, but the answer is yes. Yes, there is life after menopause – and it’s not so bad.

A reader shared with me recently the grief and emotional struggles she is experiencing as she comes to terms with the fact that she is no longer (at least in her mind) an attractive, desirable woman, since she began to go through perimenopause.

Having walked that road, I know exactly how she feels, and the kinds of questions she is likely asking herself about this profound, mid-life transition called menopause. I mean, let’s face it. You’ve spent 40-something years defining and cultivating a life and personal identity, only to have it obliterated all to hell and back by hot flashes, mood swings, and night sweats.

And that’s just the short list.

But life transitions aren’t easy for anybody. I have a 22 year old son who often laments the loss of his carefree childhood as he is now dealing with grown-up realities like expensive car repairs, health insurance costs, college loan debt, and just the day-to-day, non-sexy, no-fun decisions, grown-ups have to make every day of their life.

I don’t have the heart to tell him that just when he gets this part of his life figured out, it changes all over again.

I think what makes the menopause transition so difficult for women is that we are beginning to face the reality of our own mortality. Sure, we talk about our sagging breasts, our lagging libido, and feeling so oldwhen we start going through perimenopause and menopause. But, what we really mean, is that we realize we are closer to death and dying than we’ve ever been before – and it’s scary. It’s sobering. It’s existential.

But, there’s a funny thing about facing death and dying. It makes you realize how much you should live.

Perhaps that is why many women become so fierce once they reach menopause. They realize without equivocation that the number of years they have left on this earth are ticking down fast, and if they don’t get on with living them they are gone.

The thing I personally love about menopause is that it forces your hand. There’s no place to run, no place to hide. You’re past middle-age and you’re facing down death whether you like it or not. It’s crunch time. Yes, it’s uncomfortable and difficult. Sometimes it’s damn well excruciating. But it’s a crossroad of life, and you get to choose the road you’re going to walk.

I don’t know about you, but I find that rather empowering. I can’t control the fact that I’m dying. But I can control how I live. I don’t have to “go gentle into that good night”  so I won’t. I don’t know that I want to“rage, rage, against the dying of the light” either. I had enough of raging and mood swings during perimenopause, thank you very much.

I would much rather just “live like I am dying.” Because we all are, menopause sisters. We all are.

Magnolia Miller is a certified healthcare consumer advocate in women’s health and a women’s freelance health writer and blogger at The Perimenopause Blog.

10 Psychological Studies That Will Change What You Think You Know About Yourself

10 Psychological Studies That Will Change What You Think You Know About Yourself

Why do we do the things we do? Despite our best attempts to “know thyself,” the truth is that we often know astonishingly little about our own minds, and even less about the way others think. As Charles Dickens once put it, “A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other.”

Psychologists have long sought insights into how we perceive the world and what motivates our behavior, and they’ve made enormous strides in lifting that veil of mystery. Aside from providing fodder for stimulating cocktail-party conversations, some of the most famous psychological experiments of the past century reveal universal and often surprising truths about human nature. Here are 10 classic psychological studies that may change the way you understand yourself.

We all have some capacity for evil.

Arguably the most famous experiment in the history of psychology, the 1971 Stanford prison study put a microscope on how social situations can affect human behavior. The researchers, led by psychologist Philip Zimbardo, set up a mock prison in the basement of the Stanford psych building and selected 24 undergraduates (who had no criminal record and were deemed psychologically healthy) to act as prisoners and guards. Researchers then observed the prisoners (who had to stay in the cells 24 hours a day) and guards (who shared eight-hour shifts) using hidden cameras.

Long time

The experiment, which was scheduled to last for two weeks, had to be cut short after just six days due to the guards’ abusive behavior — in some cases they even inflicted psychological torture — and the extreme emotional stress and anxiety exhibited by the prisoners.

“The guards escalated their aggression against the prisoners, stripping them naked, putting bags over their heads, and then finally had them engage in increasingly humiliating sexual activities,” Zimbardo told American Scientist. “After six days I had to end it because it was out of control — I couldn’t really go to sleep at night without worrying what the guards could do to the prisoners.”

We don’t notice what’s right in front of us.

Think you know what’s going on around you? You might not be nearly as aware as you think. In 1998, researchers from Harvard and Kent State University targeted pedestrians on a college campus to determine how much people notice about their immediate environments. In the experiment, an actor came up to a pedestrian and asked for directions. While the pedestrian was giving the directions, two men carrying a large wooden door walked between the actor and the pedestrian, completely blocking their view of each other for several seconds. During that time, the actor was replaced by another actor, one of a different height and build, and with a different outfit, haircut and voice. A full half of the participants didn’t notice the substitution.

The experiment was one of the first to illustrate the phenomenon of “change blindness,” which shows just how selective we are about what we take in from any given visual scene — and it seems that we rely on memory and pattern-recognition significantly more than we might think.

Delaying gratification is hard — but we’re more successful when we do.

child marshmallows

A famous Stanford experiment from the late 1960s tested preschool children’s ability to resist the lure of instant gratification — and it yielded some powerful insights about willpower and self-discipline. In the experiment, four-year-olds were put in a room by themselves with a marshmallow on a plate in front of them, and told that they could either eat the treat now, or if they waited until the researcher returned 15 minutes later, they could have two marshmallows.

While most of the children said they’d wait, they often struggled to resist and then gave in, eating the treat before the researcher returned, TIME reports. The children who did manage to hold off for the full 15 minutes generally used avoidance tactics, like turning away or covering their eyes. The implications of the children’s behavior were significant: Those who were able to delay gratification were much less likely to be obese, or to have drug addiction or behavioral problems by the time they were teenagers, and were more successful later in life.

We can experience deeply conflicting moral impulses.

A famous 1961 study by Yale psychologist Stanley Milgram tested (rather alarmingly) how far people would go to obey authority figures when asked to harm others, and the intense internal conflict between personal morals and the obligation to obey authority figures.

Milgram wanted to conduct the experiment to provide insight into how Nazi war criminals could have perpetuated unspeakable acts during the Holocaust. To do so, he tested a pair of participants, one deemed the “teacher” and the other deemed the “learner.” The teacher was instructed to administer electric shocks to the learner (who was supposedly sitting in another room, but in reality was not being shocked) each time they got questions wrong. Milgram instead played recordings which made it sound like the learner was in pain, and if the “teacher” subject expressed a desire to stop, the experimenter prodded him to go on. During the first experiment, 65 percent of participants administered a painful, final 450-volt shock (labeled “XXX”), although many were visibly stressed and uncomfortable about doing so.

While the study has commonly been seen as a warning of blind obedience to authority, Scientific American recently revisited it, arguing that the results were more suggestive of deep moral conflict.

“Human moral nature includes a propensity to be empathetic, kind and good to our fellow kin and group members, plus an inclination to be xenophobic, cruel and evil to tribal others,” journalist Michael Shermer wrote. “The shock experiments reveal not blind obedience but conflicting moral tendencies that lie deep within.”

Recently, some commenters have called Milgram’s methodology into question, and one critic noted that records of the experiment performed at Yale suggested that 60 percent of participants actually disobeyed orders to administer the highest-dosage shock.

We’re easily corrupted by power.

o-plate-of-cookies-570

There’s a psychological reason behind the fact that those in power sometimes act towards others with a sense of entitlement and disrespect. A 2003 study published in the journal Psychological Review put students into groups of three to write a short paper together. Two students were instructed to write the paper, while the other was told to evaluate the paper and determine how much each student would be paid. In the middle of their work, a researcher brought in a plate of five cookies. Although generally the last cookie was never eaten, the “boss” almost always ate the fourth cookie — and ate it sloppily, mouth open.

“When researchers give people power in scientific experiments, they are more likely to physically touch others in potentially inappropriate ways, to flirt in more direct fashion, to make risky choices and gambles, to make first offers in negotiations, to speak their mind, and to eat cookies like the Cookie Monster, with crumbs all over their chins and chests,” psychologist Dacher Keltner, one of the study’s leaders, wrote in an article for UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center.

We seek out loyalty to social groups and are easily drawn to intergroup conflict.

On Three

This classic 1950s social psychology experiment shined a light on the possible psychological basis of why social groups and countries find themselves embroiled in conflict with one another — and how they can learn to cooperate again.

Study leader Muzafer Sherif took two groups of 11 boys (all age 11) to Robbers Cave State Park in Oklahoma for “summer camp.” The groups (named the “Eagles” and the “Rattlers”) spent a week apart, having fun together and bonding, with no knowledge of the existence of the other group. When the two groups finally integrated, the boys started calling each other names, and when they started competing in various games, more conflict ensued and eventually the groups refused to eat together. In the next phase of the research, Sherif designed experiments to try to reconcile the boys by having them enjoy leisure activities together (which was unsuccessful) and then having them solve a problem together, which finally began to ease the conflict.

We only need one thing to be happy.

The 75-year Harvard Grant study —one of the most comprehensive longitudinal studies ever conducted — followed 268 male Harvard undergraduates from the classes of 1938-1940 (now well into their 90s) for 75 years, regularly collecting data on various aspects of their lives. The universal conclusion? Love really is all that matters, at least when it comes to determining long-term happiness and life satisfaction.

The study’s longtime director, psychiatrist George Vaillant, told The Huffington Postthat there are two pillars of happiness: “One is love. The other is finding a way of coping with life that does not push love away.” For example, one participant began the study with the lowest rating for future stability of all the subjects and he had previously attempted suicide. But at the end of his life, he was one of the happiest. Why? As Vaillant explains, “He spent his life searching for love.”

We thrive when we have strong self-esteem and social status.

o-oscar-statue-570

Achieving fame and success isn’t just an ego boost — it could also be a key to longevity, according to the notorious Oscar winners study. Researchers from Toronto’s Sunnybrook and Women’s College Health Sciences Centre found that Academy Award-winning actors and directors tend to live longer than those who were nominated but lost, with winning actors and actresses outliving their losing peers by nearly four years.

“We are not saying that you will live longer if you win an Academy Award,” Donald Redelmeier, the lead author of the study, told ABC News. “Or that people should go out and take acting courses. Our main conclusion is simply that social factors are important … It suggests that an internal sense of self-esteem is an important aspect to health and health care.”

We constantly try to justify our experiences so that they make sense to us.

Anyone who’s taken a freshman Psych 101 class is familiar with cognitive dissonance, a theory which dictates that human beings have a natural propensity to avoid psychological conflict based on disharmonious or mutually exclusive beliefs. In an often-cited 1959 experiment, psychologist Leon Festinger asked participants to perform a series of dull tasks, like turning pegs in a wooden knob, for an hour. They were then paid either $1 or $20 to tell a “waiting participant” (aka a researcher) that the task was very interesting. Those who were paid $1 to lie rated the tasks as more enjoyable than those who were paid $20. Their conclusion? Those who were paid more felt that they had sufficient justification for having performed the rote task for an hour, but those who were only paid $1 felt the need to justify the time spent (and reduce the level of dissonance between their beliefs and their behavior) by saying that the activity was fun. In other words, we commonly tell ourselves lies to make the world appear a more logical, harmonious place.

We buy into stereotypes in a big way.

o-old-woman-shutterstock-570

Stereotyping various groups of people based on social group, ethnicity or class is something nearly all of us do, even if we make an effort not to — and it can lead us to draw unfair and potentially damaging conclusions about entire populations. NYU psychologist John Bargh’s experiments on “automaticity of social behavior”revealed that we often judge people based on unconscious stereotypes — and we can’t help but act on them. We also tend to buy into stereotypes for social groups that we see ourselves being a part of. In one study, Bargh found that a group of participants who were asked to unscramble words related to old age — “Florida,” “helpless” and “wrinkled” — walked significantly slower down the hallway after the experiment than the group who unscrambled words unrelated to age. Bargh repeated the findings in two other comparable studies that enforced stereotypes based on race and politeness.

“Stereotypes are categories that have gone too far,” Bargh told Psychology Today. “When we use stereotypes, we take in the gender, the age, the color of the skin of the person before us, and our minds respond with messages that say hostile, stupid, slow, weak. Those qualities aren’t out there in the environment. They don’t reflect reality.”

Source: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/18/20-psychological-studies-_n_4098779.html 

 

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